When was the last time you tried something new—something that came with the very real possibility of falling flat on your face? Too often, we avoid the unfamiliar because we’re afraid of failure or looking foolish. But what if we embraced the falls as part of the process?
One winter, we took our boys ice skating for the first time. They were unsteady, awkward, and tumbled to the ice more times than I could count. And yet, with every fall, they simply laughed, got back up, and tried again. No fear, no hesitation—just determination and joy in the process of learning.
Their resilience reminded me that every new skill, goal, or adventure comes with a learning curve. Falling isn’t failure—it’s progress. This week, I’m sharing the chapter Put on the Skates from my book, a story that will inspire you to let go of perfection, embrace the messy process of growth, and step into the rink, falls and all.
Fall. Get up. Fall. Get up. Fall. Get up.
In the winter of 2018, we took our boys ice skating for the first time. Here’s how the night went: they fell, and then they got right back up. And they did this over and over.
It wasn’t a super-cold night, but with each fall, their pants and gloves got wetter from the melting ice. The cold air, wet clothes, and lack of skill didn’t faze them. With every fall, they rose again. They laughed and smiled with each wipeout and pulled themselves up with a fierce determination to make it around the rink.
By the end of the night, their cheeks were freezing, butts were sore, and their pants were soaking wet. But their resolve to ice-skate was on fire. After skating for a few hours, we decided to treat the boys to hot chocolate (and hot toddies for us). While we sipped our piping hot drinks, the boys gushed about how much fun they had at the rink. My husband and I praised them for sticking with it. We were proud of them for getting back up time and time again and never complaining about the cold. We loved their tenacity, attitude, and determination to learn this new skill.
Not once did they express discouragement. Not once did they talk about quitting. They both exchanged their skates for a different pair at one point that evening—convinced their constant falling was an equipment error. I can’t blame them. Magic skates would have been the ultimate fix. But nothing slowed them down. Even their sore butts and iced-over pants. They loved everything about the experience. And the next day? They woke up early, and the first thing they asked was, “Can we go ice skating today?”
I reflected a lot on that experience in the weeks that followed. New challenges create new opportunities for failure and success. Starting something new is never easy. It tests our resolve, determination, tenacity, and character. It takes courage to fight the fear. It takes a steadfast belief that it’s worth it. It takes a steadfast belief that we are worth it.
There is a learning curve for everything. As adults, it’s hard to ride the learning curve. Often, we want to be on the other side of the curve from day one. When we put big dreams and goals into action, we become vulnerable to failure. Because dreaming and planning involve risk, our fears are ignited. We question if we ever should have “put on skates” in the first place with each failure or fall. We doubt our ability, talent, and the ensuing path forward.
Personal achievements create significant fulfillment. And these achievements take time—and A LOT of failures. To discover your purpose—which REQUIRES many failures—is a success! What if you faced your fears, took risks, and embraced failure more like my boys did when they learned to skate? They relished the experience and all of the ups and downs. They never expected to become champions the first night out; they just wanted to learn how to skate. They didn’t care what other people thought every time they wiped out; they focused on getting back on their feet. They never questioned if they could even learn how to skate; their vision of skating was more significant than any fall.
We went skating again just a few days later, and they continued to fall, over and over and over. And they continued to try, again and again. Their determination was fierce.
Enjoy the experience and each fall. Get up, and know that you’ll fall again and again. (And again.) Appreciate the journey. One day, you’ll reminisce about how far you’ve come. And I promise you won’t even remember the cold.
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